I Did Not Make This Up

For reals.

1. Human bites are actually super dangerous.
2. Jill and her Drum Machine are performing their one woman/one drum machine improv show at the Brave New Workshop this Friday. Please go see her. $10 at 11 pm. You could bring $11 and show up at 10, in which case you'd be a dollar up and an hour early. You guys, she's famous.
3. This person had a dream that A.C. Slater was named "Steak." That alone is enough to make me a devotee. But! Terrible! The most recent entry is October of 2007. So she's obviously dead.
   
4. How much more terrible would #3 be if she were actually dead?! So much more terrible!