Mexico by the Numb3rs (that one was for my dad who watches that weird show on CBS with the guy who killed Kellie Martin's character on ER)

Today we joined a nudist colony. I will spare you the Sharpie Art.
Just kidding.
I proposed marriage and Matt said no.
Just kidding again.
Wait, that wasn't a joke.
Circumstances change. We find out that people won't be around forever (as if it is some great mystery...What? People will be born and they will die? What is this crap?) And not that it's not crap. It is. It just makes you realize that if you had a year left and you wanted to get some shit done, you do it. And so.
It was the first of what I hope to call My Stream of Marriage Proposal Rejections Parts I-III.
After 3 I'm done being rejected. Third time's a... I'm Not Going To Live Through Another Rejection Even If I Was A Little Sauced, Because I Do Love You and I Don't Care Who Knows It.
Ahem.
In other news, we did go to a nude beach. It was mostly non-nude. But there were a daring five. (That's eight boobies and one...gentleman without trousers, for those of you keeping track). See how I distract you with body parts from the fact that something in my personal life is now public?
Look! Zebras! Mystifying stripes!

Internet Cafe With An Ocean View (If You Bring A Picture Of An Ocean In With You)

While I waited to use the interwebs, here in Huatulco, I picked up a little light reading. The Sports Illustrated College Basketball issue of 1996-97 lists Chauncey Billups as one to watch. So look out for him. 10 years ago.
I imagine that Huatulco is like Myrtle Beach. If in Myrtle Beach people harass you about buying trinkets and local flavor is a guy saying,"Hey, Man. Where you from?"
Uh...shut up.
So instead of sweating out the humidity on beach front property, we called our parents on analog roam (thank you, technology) and decided to see a movie. I chose Pirates of the Carribean, part 2.
Matt chose: Tokyo Sinks.
We will regroup after and write reviews.
In Spanish, of course.

I´ll Take A Beer With My Politics, Please

Old Man in Mitla: Que piensas de la guerra con Israel y...
(hic)
OMIM: Suisse...
(hic)
OMIM: Suisse?
Matt: Lebanon?

Brain: Cerrado For Cleaning

My rate of failed to successful Spanish: 809 to 1.
For shame, for shame.
I walked away from a perfectly lovely though completely unnecessary* top today in the zocalo because Matt wouldn´t help me ask the quiet lady how much it was. She was not impressed.
Or maybe she was irritated to be nursing a child well over two years. Who can say?

*Luggage arrived yesterday late afternoon and as I pulled it up the stairs, ramp, stairs, ramp, stairs into our dwelling I realized I had overzealously overpacked.

Should Have Packed Deodorant In My Carry On

Huevos rancheros, everybody!
We´re here.
Unfortunately, our luggage decided not to join us. Thank you, Continental. You knew it would only spoil us to have toothbrushes.
I´d also like to send a shout out to my man, Seguridad 073422, for offering to send our bags here for free, (if and) when they are found.
If by chance our valises decided to ship themselves back home, let them know that they can find us by using the family whistle.

BRB

Matt and I are going away again on Tuesday and will be back on August 11. I'll give you a few hints:

1. I ate a gyro.
2. The salad from Saturday's wedding had olives in it.
3. I'm reading the Bible--in Greek.

If you guessed rainy Oaxaca, Mexico, you're right!
In lieu of my usual freakout, I've already packed. Yeeehaw.

Fore Score and Twenty Hours Ago

What's that, Sri, a golf tee in your hair?!
Why, yes. Thank you for noticing. I did a little golfing* yesterday in the blistering heat of Fred Richards' course.
The hair ornamentation totally upped my street cred among the local pros, which I really needed since I missed the ball 5 times before making initial contact.
As for the other players:
Matt threw a club. Carly made par (once). Poppa did not get a sunburn.

*Officially, I hit one ball far and a few putts. Really, very little golfing, but I did walk all the holes.

Mason Jennings Sang Me To Sleep (or was that a movie on Hong Kong Nihilists?)

Acer's mouse is on a 5-second time delay, which acts sort of like a parental control for bedtime.
"Are you sure you need to blog now, honey? Shouldn't you put down the computer and step away from the internet(s)*?"
No.

A list of things I memoed in the last 48 hours to tell myself and you, the internet(s)**:

• Sexual harrassment from the custodians
• Physical Tuesday--don't be awkward--male doctor
• I always forget my galoshes when it f*#74ing rains. Whyyyyyy?
• Why do children of police get in trouble with the law? For attention? They think they're above the law? Cue Arnold Schwartzehrehhherrgerrr (sp?): Nobody is above the law. Nobody.
  
• Matt: music stand
  
• Irritable bowels ruined my night--ask male doctor, but don't be awkward

*That one was for you, Rin.
**And that one was for Eric.

Just Like That Gwyneth Paltrow Duet

Air Conditioning Not Included
Originally uploaded by Sriracha.

Colleen and I passed this Sea-Foam Wonder on 94 last weekend.
We turned to each other to celebrate the rural American glory and both of us without our cameras. What are the odds?*
If you recognize this truck or know these people, please send them to me. I want to put them in and their tigerlillies in my pocket for all times.

*Sidebar: I went to college with a kid who wrote a book called What Are The Odds. People were always making that joke. I tried to find new ways of saying it: "What is the likelihood that this specific event occurred at this specific moment?", "How unusually serendipitous!", "You're joking if you think that would happen ever again!", "Eh! I'll take two."

I'm An Idiot. [Reprise]

"Shoot."
"I cannot see a damn thing."
"What does that say?"
"Not unless I hold my eyelids to the side like this."
And today Dr. Mike asks me if I "might be wearing them in the wrong eyes?"
"I might."
I was.
For a month.
A month of headaches and squinting and sweaty glasses slipping off my face rather than wear those [expletive] contacts for one minute more because what kind of doctor prescribes the completely wrong thing and another thing why is this industry taking me for all the money in my uninsured vision life?
They're not.
Ass.