Maybe if I were FIVE

"Oop! I almost hit you!"
"Sorry," I say. I moved out of the way in time thanks to some cat-like reflexes and the ability to look forward.
The old woman chirps after me: "It's dangerous to walk by closed doors. I almost hit a lot of kids and I tell them it's dangerous to walk by closed doors."
In my mind, I tell her that since it's a Monday morning, I'm much more likely to walk myself AND OTHERS by closed doors.