Matt is Not a Robot (and how I did not get beaten by a Robot...or Matt, a human)

[Disclaimer: There was no abuse. This is not a cry for help. This is a cry for carpeting at work. ]
I fell down the stairs yesterday.
Hard, cold stairs.
Face first.
I had time to grab the railing while my body wrapped over and my left leg mangled itself under the rest of me.
The woman walking down the hall behind me played it so cool, pretending not to see me until she got within a few feet. Why do we do that? Why do we ignore each other? Whyyyyy aren't we all Good Samaritans....whyyyyyy? I needed her help to get up.
And now I'm wearing pants that are too long. I started off with double-sided tape but now I have a rhinestone brooch (on the inside, of course!) pinning up one leg to make them short enough so I don't have to wear heels and risk another tumble. Not that one leg is longer, but that one leg was staying up with double-sided tape until I got to work.